I’m sure a lot of you have spoken to ex-RFCP members and heard their stories. Sha’s story is very similar but it is very intense and unlike anything I have ever seen. Her experience with Prior Bumble throughout her 15 months of knowing him has been a rollercoaster with no stability. He has been like a drug to her and she has been addicted. He has taken advantage of her attachment to him and has used it to make himself feel powerful and alpha in their friendship. He has used her for her love and loyalty and milked it out of her until she had nothing left for herself. He has used her as a crutch for months and watched her neglect her real life and mental health to focus entirely on RFCP. He has played mind games with her: demoting her because he is in a bad mood, banning her from the server, blocking her. Meanwhile Sha was left broken, scared, and alone, because she didn’t have Prior Bumble there to talk to her. She has developed terrible abandonment issues due to this and it affects her relationships with people in real life. She thinks the way she was treated is all her fault. She had been dealing with this alone for months before we started dating.
Prior Bumble is an emotional abuser- I will show screenshots as evidence, explain the signs of emotional abuse, and explain how Prior Bumble meets almost all the criteria on the list.
This past year has been very traumatic for her, especially since her whole life revolved around Prior and RFCP’s happiness. This has taken such a toll on her; two of their past fights have resulted in her being hospitalized due to suicidal thoughts. He has blamed her for all of her feelings of anger, emotion, and resentment towards the way he has treated her. She still thinks it is her fault and she deserved to be treated that way.
Prior Bumble has even also said that his harsh reactions (such as kicking or banning her from the army) are to help her, not him or the army. He would gaslight her into thinking he did it to help her and that she was overreacting.
Sha has had a rough home life and goes online for most of her support. Due to the isolation from the community from May through July (Ukahala), and RFCP (because of the constant bans and demotions), she relied on Prior Bumble for nearly all of the support she needed. He was all she had and he knew that. Isolation is obviously a tactic Prior Bumble uses to retain full control over his army: it allows him to control and manipulate the way his soldiers see him, it allows him to control the way his soldiers see the community so he can be told he is innocent and has done nothing wrong, it allows him to have full control over dozens of people, and it allows him to feel better than everyone. That is why they have a no army server policy, and that is why they banned visitors for months. He is so insecure about his leadership and the bad things he has done so he does everything he can to keep the truth from being spread to his army. “Ukahala” was to keep his army from finding out the truth.
Moreover, Prior Bumble only cares about him and his own safety. Back when pictures of Sha’s family were being spread, Sha was attempting to find emotional support in him, but instead of comforting her like any good Commander in Chief should do, he flippantly threw his hands in the air and barked, “who cares.”
As seen in the screenshots above, Prior Bumble will prioritize what he perceives as important and completely shut down other peoples’ happening issues in order for his problems to be focused on. Sha and I were expected to drop everything for him when he “commanded” us to. If we were tired and needed sleep but he told us we needed to stay up and VC with him, we did so. It developed to the point where Sha was in constant communication with him for days on end, and if she got on his nerves, he would block her or threaten to cut her out of his life and RFCP completely.
If he actually cared about her, he would never block her and threaten to leave her over Club Penguin drama. He would also never give her a list of things she needs to do in order to be his friend, which he did. Prior Bumble is a bad friend to her and when it comes to actually putting her needs before his army and commander needs, he is unable to do that. She didn’t feel any worth outside of RFCP because that’s all he ever wanted her for; to take care of him and his army.
He has been down right nasty to her and didn’t regret any of it. He would bully her and force her into submission by being mean to her. Here are some random screenshots from their encounters.
Sha wanted a video of her off the RFCP YouTube and when she requested that Prior take it down, he refused because he claimed her reasoning is selfish and that she needs to suffer community harassment alongside him.
Sha also out of fear responded to every message he sent her, no matter what was going on. She was convinced that his needs were more important than his, and didn’t snap out of this until recently. Her car was broken on the side of the freeway and Prior Bumble yelled at her to do army stuff. I was on the phone with her throughout this entire incident trying to calm her down as she panicked and cried.
These next screenshots also demonstrate Prior Bumble’s abuse towards Sha.
Now that you have seen the evidence, I’d like to educate you on how all of this is real emotional abuse. I am going to provide you with examples of emotional abuse and compare it to things Prior Bumble has done.
My source of this information is here:
- making demands or orders and expecting them to be fulfilled– Prior Bumble expects every one of his orders to be listened to without hesitation.
- making all decisions – Prior Bumble makes all of the big decisions for his army and rarely consulted his hcom or advisors, unless it was a minor decision.
- continually monitoring another person’s whereabouts – Prior Bumble’s spy division (Zero Cap Alpha) regularly kept tabs on their soldiers and would check to see if they were in other army servers.
- treating the person as though they are a child – Prior Bumble refers to himself as Papa and the father of all his soldiers.
- using the other’s persons fears; abusive people will often manipulate a person’s fears to control them – Prior Bumble knew Sha was afraid of losing him and would often ignore her or threaten to leave has as a way to give himself more control over her behavior
- withholding affection; abusers may punish a person for “bad” behavior by withholding affection or making them feel they are undeserving of love – Prior Bumble would not give Sha the reassurance or love she wanted from him if she was “bad” or “defiant”
- Lectures: The abusive person may give lectures about the other person’s behavior, in a way to make it clear that the other person is inferior. – Prior Bumble lectured Sha everytime she “misbehaved”, and would make her feel guilty and small.
- Outbursts: This involves aspects of control, as well. Not doing what an abusive person wants may result in an outburst of angry behavior from them. It is both a way to control the person and make them feel shame for “not listening.” – You can all scroll up and see Prior Bumble yelling at Sha for not listening and for having bad behavior
- Walkouts: Abusive people may leave a situation rather than resolve it. In a disagreement at home, for example, they may remark about how the other is “crazy.” – Prior Bumble would often block Sha or refuse to dm her back when she was being “crazy”, check the above screenshots.
- Trivializing: If the other person wishes to talk about their issues or problems, the abusive person may criticize them for even having the issue or tell them that they are making a big deal out of nothing.– Prior Bumble said “I don’t care” when Sha expressed to him her fear of her family being doxxed. He also didn’t care when she was uncomfortable with a video of herself being on the internet. He also got mad at her for not doing prioritizing his “crisis”
- Jealously: The abusive person may regularly confront the other for talking to or “flirting with” other people. They may accuse the other person of cheating on them regularly. – We cover Prior Bumble’s jealousy towards Sha and I’s relationship in another post
- Playing the victim: The abusive person may try to turn the tables on the other person by blaming them for the issues the abusive person has not dealt with. They may even accuse the other person of being the abusive one in the relationship. – Prior Bumble would often blame his treatment towards Sha on the fact that she is crazy. As seen in an above screenshots, Prior Bumble said that Sha’s mental health is the reason she is always sad, not him.
- Egging the person on: The abusive person typically knows how to get the other one angry. They may irritate them until the person becomes upset, and then blame them for getting upset. – there is an above screenshot of Prior Bumble saying he “trolled” Sha in an attempt to upset her.
- Ukahala isolation from the community
- Not allowing soldiers in army servers
- Not allowing visitors
After interacting with Prior Bumble online since January, and seeing his conversations with Sha, it is obvious to me that he treats her and many others this way to give himself a stronger sense of power. He feels that overpowering everyone and everything in sight is how to be a good leader. Any disagreement with him is seen as “challenging” his leadership and “alpha” tendencies. You either let him abuse you and treat you the way he wants to treat you or you suffer the consequences. Your feelings will never be prioritized in a friendship with Prior Bumble unless it benefits him. If you don’t do exactly what he wants you to do then you will be bullied until you either submit to him or until you break and leave, but we all know what Prior Bumble does to people who leave. In Sha’s case it was easier to just give him what he wanted because if she didn’t then her life was made a living hell. He made her feel like she wouldn’t ever find someone better than him
Prior Bumble is definitely one of the most emotionally abusive people I have come across. I don’t know if he realizes that he is, which is why I wanted to discuss all of the signs. This post was hard to make because I can see the pain in Sha’s messages when she speaks to him. She has been through a lot due to the way he has treated her. I hope that this has been able to provide you with some insights on one of Prior Bumble’s toxic traits and give you the tools to recognize if it’s happening to you.